5 ways to support your child’s mental health throughout their GCSEs
GCSEs can be a very challenging time for parents, particularly when your first child is going through them and you’re both unsure of what to expect. At the start of the school year the Tassomai team spoke to mental health campaigners and teenage psychotherapists to try to find out how parents can best support their children’s wellbeing throughout these difficult years, particularly during assessments.
We have picked out our experts’ top tips to give parents a strong starting point from which to navigate the complicated world of teenagers’ mental health. We hope that these tips can equip you with the knowledge and confidence you need to start important conversations and continue to support your child through their GCSEs and beyond.
1. Madeleine Inkin, clinical child psychotherapist and co-founder of Tassomai
“Adults use the prefrontal cortex to make decisions and choices, while teenagers will mostly use their 'gut reaction' – the emotional centre, the ‘amygdala’, which is located further back in the brain and develops before the prefrontal cortex. This explains why teenagers experience mood swings; they tend to react quickly from the emotional part of their brain and don’t run their reactions through the more rational frontal cortex,” says Madeleine.
“Their growing brains are being completely rewired, completely re-written. And they don't stop developing at 19 – they keep developing and changing well into their mid-twenties.” Madeleine’s advice is to “try to keep these developmental changes in mind as you watch them grow and learn over this period. Make sure they have some downtime to explore and connect with the world around them, and to simply relax every so often too.”
To read more from Madeleine about how the teenage brain works and develops, click here.
2. Ben West, mental health campaigner
“My biggest piece of advice would be to act early. Don’t brush anything under the carpet, don’t wait for things to seem ‘more serious’, address issues when you notice them. Look, I’m not a parent and I know it must be hard to have these kinds of conversations but we have to intercept before things get the chance to deteriorate. This might involve some uncomfortable conversations, but it can quite literally save lives.”
Ben stresses that “people don’t compare mental health to their physical health enough – if you were concerned for your child’s physical health you would be straight down to your GP asking for a check up and making sure everything was ok. You wouldn’t leave an infection to ‘clear up by itself’, you would act, and the same has to go for mental health.”
For more of Ben’s top tips on supporting your child’s mental health, click here.
3. Sam Clark, teacher, writer and founder of the Resilience for Kids
“Developing an environment where children feel confident to talk openly is the absolute foundation for building resilience. To encourage this, we need to make it clear that life is no fairy tale, and that everybody faces challenges every day. The recognition of this belief will make children much more likely to speak out,” says Sam.
He continues, “having adults model openness is important too. It might seem strange to share your fears and hopes with your children but this will further encourage that open dialogue. Providing the knowledge (the why) can be a gamechanger for some. The moment children realise that expressing themselves is a healthy discipline and helps to ease their fears, they are often sparked into sharing their thoughts.”
Find out more from Sam about building resilience in children in this article.
4. Karen Collins, Lead Science Associate for PiXL
After spending many years with students at her school, Karen is aware that “right before assessments many students will be showing physical signs of stress as their fight or flight response kicks in with their adrenaline – their hands might shake, their heart might be beating faster – which is why I think it is really useful to have sessions where you explain these responses to students and help them understand the biology behind it.
“By understanding what is happening in your body, you are better equipped to take yourself through some logistical steps or techniques to regain control and be able to focus on the assessment. Learning breathing exercises, meditating and practising yoga can all help to calm these nerves and there are loads of YouTube videos students can watch and learn from,” advices Karen.
5. Murray Morrison, revision expert and founder of Tassomai
Murray has worked with thousands of students preparing for exams and can spot the telltale signs of exam-stressed children, the most concerning, he says, is the one he’s nicknamed ‘The Ostrich’. “The ostrich is that student who, at the mere mention of their exams – or their revision – buries their head in the sand. They could be quite obvious in this behaviour – “I don’t want to talk about it” – or it might be subtler, finding an excuse to get out of the room and avoid the topic.
Waste no time in confronting this behaviour and making a plan together, because the very act of avoidance means that the revision work will pile up and the stress will increase.”
To find out more about the different signs of exam stress, click here.
We hope you found these tips helpful and feel prepared to take on the challenges of the GCSE years together with your child. GCSEs are a stressful time for all the family, and the first exams that really matter for most students. We’ve put together a handbook to help guide families through GCSEs, drawing on the expertise of our network and sharing the lessons we’ve learnt as a leading edtech platform. For more information and advice from our experts, download our free GCSE Survival Guide for parents HERE. If you are a teacher please share the download link with parents of year 9-11 students at your school.